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The Fall of The eXile For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
June 11, 2008 in eXile Blog

War Nerd: War of the Babies in Taki's Magazine The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
May 28, 2008 in eXile Blog

Kids, Meet Your President A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
May 22, 2008 in eXile Blog

Cellphone Democracy Cam If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Dyev Photos Yet another hot Russian babe imitating the Catpower look...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control

Proof That Genetic Memory Is Real! Sure, the Ottomans shut down the Istanbul Slavic slave markets centuries ago...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

Russia's Orthodox Church Youth Outreach Program The priest is going, "Father Sansei is very impressed with grasshopper Sasha’s...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Club Photos w/Russian Dyevs We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

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[SIC!] May 8, 2008
 
Your Letters
 
Page 2 of 3
 

Im not in Iraq...because I've allready been dumbass... how about you? Ive earned my right to surf all I want. Now.... you got anything substitive to say about that?

Fix your crappy server.... its still slow as honey in the winter.

Daniel Allen

Dear Mr. Allen, You are our hero. God bless you. Oh, and please brush your teeth.

WHITEY DEVIL

Gary

I've only read a couple of your columns but I wanted to drop you a line and let you know that I enjoy them. Its refreshing to see that I'm not the only idiot with nothing better to do than to read about military forces. My interests seem to be more recent and conventional than yours-I'm more interested in the Korean War and the Eastern Front WWII than you, but there's no question that you know what you're talking about and that you're writing well about the subject.

Here's a dumb question-I assume that you wargame? The boardgames are definitely better than the computer products, but the programmers have done some amazing stuff. I play ASL and a few of the others. I'm going to start trolling your archives and reading your older stuff. Feel free to drop me a line sometime.

Bryan White

Duncanville, TX

Dear Mr. White, Barack Obama replies, "Let me just say first of all to Bryan that I appreciate your letter, and I think it raises an important issue to the American people. You see, for too long now, the American people have been subjected to the KILL WHITEY! KILL THE MUTHUFUCKUH! KILL BRYAN WHITE AND ALL HIS MO’FO’ CRACKER-ASS FAMILY! old way of playing wargames, and the old way of doing politics. Quite frankly, as Bryan’s letter shows, the American people are sick and tired of the politics of division, and they’re looking for change, for hope, for a way TO KILL WHITEY! TAKE ALL HIS MUTHUFUCKIN SHIT, STEAL HIS MUTHUFUCKIN SATURN, AND SELL IT ALL ON THE SIDE, MAN! to address real-world issues, such as how to pay the mortgage, how to play a war game, and how to KILL WHITEY! On behalf of Bryan White and all the Bryan Whites out there, I say, YO’ DAY IS COMIN’ FOO’!

KEEP ON [sic]CING

Vlad,

I been reading you for a while man and you are right on! I lived in USA for 22 years and it's exactly like you describe it. Keep on writing man~!

Plamen

Dear Mr. Plamen, Actually, ever since we saw this letter to Vlad, we told him to stop writing. You only have yourself to blame for the fact that Vlad hasn’t posted a single blog entry since. Folks, can you please stop saying things like "keep on doing the thing you’re doing right now," this isn’t a goddamn soccer practice or the local Gold’s Gym incline bench press. By tainting our genius with your words of encouragement, you give the impression that you somehow have a hand in it all. Here’s some news for you: YOUR HAND IS DISEASED WITH MEDIOCRITY, AND IT’S HIGHLY COMMUNICABLE. KEEP YOUR MEDIOCRE WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT AWAY FROM OUR DELICATE GENIUS. JUST SHUTTUP, AND FIND A WAY TO SEND US YOUR MONEY IN SOME ANONYMOUS MANNER THAT DOESN’T PUT US INTO DIRECT OR INDIRECT OR EVEN INDIRECT-TWICE-REMOVED CONTACT WITH YOU. Okay, we’re calming down a bit… Look, if that doesn’t work, well then, forget what we just wrote there. I mean, who the heck’re we kiddin here? Of course we’ll take the praise. We’re vain, Plamen. Our vanity is matched only by our fiscal gullibility. We sit here and abuse you for paying us cheap compliments rather than dollars ‘n cents, but you know and we know that we’re not going to turn your cheap praise away. We want your money; you want your money; so you keep your money, risk losing our free creative labor, and voila! We offer yet more free creative labor! We want your praise; you give us your praise, shrugging your shoulders at how cheap and easy we are to buy off, even cheaper than Tajik construction workers. Our priorities have always been wrong, and they always will be.


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FROM THE VAULT

Facial Humilation :
In Brief!
Al Gore Concedes Prize :

Your Letters :
Al-Dilbert
Al-Dilbert :
 

 
 
 
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