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The Fall of The eXile For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
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War Nerd: War of the Babies in Taki's Magazine The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
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Kids, Meet Your President A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
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Cellphone Democracy Cam If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
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More Classy B&W Dyev Photos Yet another hot Russian babe imitating the Catpower look...
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Proof That Genetic Memory Is Real! Sure, the Ottomans shut down the Istanbul Slavic slave markets centuries ago...
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Russia's Orthodox Church Youth Outreach Program The priest is going, "Father Sansei is very impressed with grasshopper Sasha’s...
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More Classy B&W Club Photos w/Russian Dyevs We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
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Kino Korner October 20, 2006
Kino Kwikeez
By Alex Shifrin Browse author Email

The Departed

What They Say: Two rookie cops are involved on both sides of an investigation of a Boston mafia chief in this Martin Scorsese remake of a Hong Kong cop thriller. We don't want to spoil anything, so that's all we're gonna tell you. Just go out and see this film.

What We Say: Scorsese owns the wise-guy gangster genre, and now he shows John Woo how to do Hong Kong blood-'n-melodrama on American soil. While it's not quite up to Goodfellas quality, it is easily one of the best films you're going to see in a long time. Even little punk bitch DiCaprio manages to crawl back to relative legitimacy after this soon-to-be classic. Nicholson hasn't been this much fun for at least 20 years.

The Lowdown: Goodfellas meets Hill Street Blues by way of Hard-Boiled.

Best Bit: The bloodiest parts.

Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Jack Nicholson, Mark Wahlberg, Martin Sheen, Alec Baldwin.

Rating: 5/5

Playing At: Oktyabr

The Devil Wears Prada

What They Say: Based on the book of the same name, Frumpy Anne Hathaway gets a job as bitchy Meryl Streep's butt girl. Zany.

What We Say: This topic was covered much better in Swimming with Sharks. Hathaway's transformation from socially conscious liberal arts graduate to superficial fashion dork and back again is contrived and boring. Why can't Hollywood just allow its films' heroes to sell out, just like in real life?

The Lowdown: 9 to 5 meets Swimming with Sharks.

Best Bit: N/A

Starring: Meryl Streep, Stanley Tucci, Anne Hathaway.

Rating: 2/5

Playing At: Who cares

World Trade Center

What They Say: Even old-school Pygmies know what this one's about. Directed by Oliver Stone.

What We Say: Many felt that it's too soon for this film. That's just fucking stupid. 9/11 has been on screens daily for the past 5 years, so we simply don't understand what could be shocking about trying to tell the story that everyone knows. It's not a musical, people. Our issue with this movie is that it didn't address 9/11 enough. World Trade Centre is arguably the first big screen Hollywood production of 9/11, involving an A-list actor and Stone chose to focus on a very isolated sliver of happenings around something that essentially changed the face of international politics. The film was overshadowed by the weight of 9/11 almost immediately, and will be quickly forgotten. This means that we will have to wait a bit longer for the definitive story.

The Lowdown: Buried Alive meets Towering Inferno.

Best Bit: Found on the Internet.

Starring: Nicholas Cage, ethnic minorities.

Rating: 2.5/5

Playing At: Pirate kiosks

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8 Reasons - Feature
Who's More Fucked in 2008? U.S. VS RUSSIA :

Donetsk Paper Tigers : Popular sentiment in Donetsk might be fascist, but it doesn’t have to stay that way
Russia's Emerging Middle-Class Is A Myth! :

Luxury Oxygen Molecules : Free sushi and gay gigalos on top of the Ritz


Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.

Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
Automotive Section
We’re happy to introduce a new column in which we publish Moscow’s raw radio communications, courtesy of a Russian amateur radio enthusiast. This issue, eXile readers are given a peek into the secret conversations of Moscow’s traffic police, the notorious "GAIshniki."

Eleven Years of Threats: The eXile's Incredible Journey
Feature Story By The eXile
Good Night, and Bad Luck: In a nation terrorized by its own government, one newspaper dared to fart in its face. Get out your hankies, cuz we’re taking a look back at the impossible crises we overcame.

Your Letters
Russia's freedom-loving free market martyr Mikhail Khodorkovsky answers some of this week's letters, and he's got nothing but praise for President Medvedev.

Clubbing Adventures Through Time
Club Review By Dmitriy Babooshka
eXile club reviewer Babooshka takes a trip through time with the ghost of Moscow clubbing past, present and future, and true to form, gets laid in the process.

The Fortnight Spin
Bardak Calendar By Jared Lindquist
Jared comes out with yet another roundup of upcoming bardak sessions.

Your Letters
Richard Gere tackles this week's letters. Now reformed, he fights for gerbil rights all around the world.

13 Toxic Talents: Hollywood’s Worst Polluters
America By Eileen Jones
Everybody complains about celebrities, but nobody does anything about them. People, it’s time to stop fretting about whether we’re a celebrity-obsessed culture—we are, we have been, we’re going to be—and instead take practical steps to clean up the celebrity-obsessed culture we’ve got...


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