FORMER PRESIDENT BORIS YELTSIN is still as hated as ever, at least according to a poll by the LEVADA CENTER. Levada has been charting Russians' opinions ever since GORBACHEV counted out his last month in power and for almost as long, the center has been keeping track of Yeltsin's approval ratings. The latest results were published on February 1st and showed that 48% of all Russian think despise Yeltsin and 44% think he needs to be tried for his crimes committed while he was president...
ST. PETERSBURG AUTHORITIES have come up with a novel business idea. Why not convert the maternity hospital where PRESIDENT PUTIN was born into a luxury hotel? What the hell, why not! On February 2nd, Gazeta.ru reported that MATERNITY HOSPITAL NO.6, currently located in a 200-year-old historic building in the center of town, is already undergoing preliminary move preparations. And a tract of land on the outskirts has already been allocated as the hospital's new site and construction is not far off... While it isn't official, it isn't hard to guess who's behind it. ST.PETERSBURG MAYOR VALENTINA MATVIENKO did n't climb up so high from her vodka-fueled komsomol days by being dense. She knows exactly who to please and how to please 'em, the komsomol retreats taught her that. When the hotel is completed, I'd look out for the VIP V.V. PRESIDENTIAL SUITE.
In less than a year, NEW FEDERAL WEAPONS AGENCY will be created. It's sole job will be I to handle all business functions for RUSSIA'S MILITARY COMPLEX. According to a press release posted on the site of the President of the Russian Frederation, the agency will be responsible for completely managing the business side of the Russia's weapons industry, a task that is now carried out by various arms of the Russian military. In essence, the new weapons agency take over control of military budgets in the weapons sector. DEFENCE MINISTER SERGEY IVANOV didn't attempt to hide the fact that this move is a direct usurpation of power from the military. More than anything else, the new agency is an attempt to cut down corruption within Russia's weapons industry, says Lavrov. RUSSIA'S FEDERAL SERVICE FOR THE CONTROL OF THE SALE AND DISTRIBUTION OF NARCOTICS just released a VIDEO GAME designed to teach Russian pre-teen kids that drugs are bad. As NewsPskov.ru reported last week, the game, which doesn't yet seem to have a title, involves having children assist INSPECTOR NARCOSTOP battling drug ADDICTS and PUSHERS and finally taking on the game's mega bossan evil drug-synthesizing professor intent on enslaving the entire human race with drug addiction. Apparently, the game has only been spotted in the provinces. Russia's narc agents probably know the game will be a tough sell in the bigger cities...
The GOVERNER OF THE ULYANOVSK OBLAST, SERGEY MOROZOV, is doing his part to support the future of Russia. He decided that the only way to encourage good academic studies in a capitalistic Russia, is to pay up. According to a Novye Izvestie story printed February 5th, students all across the Ulyanovsk region are going to get paid 100 rubles each semester if they maintain 5's (the equivalent of A's) in all their classes. That's about $3.77 for a half-year's worth of academic toil. All in all, if a child maintains 5's in all their classes, he stands to be almost $8 dollars richer by the time summer comes around. Now that's generosity AND motivation!
RAMZAN KADYROV, the young Chechen prime minister, topped 'em all when it came to charity. In a sweeping gesture of generosity and goodwill towards his fellow Chechens, Kadyrov ADOPTED THREE ORPHANS. All three of them are boys aged six to fifteen. The new additions to his family will move from an orphanage into the Kadyrov family residence in Grozny. RIA Novosti broke the good news on Frebruary 4th, but this is by no means uncharted territory for Kadyrov. Last August, Kadyrov asked his mother to adopt a 16-year-old Slavic boy that Kadyrov promised to put through college. All in all, Kadyrov wants to adopt about ten to fifteen orphan kids in the next few years... This would be endearing, if it wasn't so perverse. You just can't trust a man that publically expresses a desire to adopt fifteen helpless boys. But hey in Chechnya, he's the chief, and you don't ever question the chief.