For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
June 11, 2008 in eXile Blog
The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
May 28, 2008 in eXile Blog
A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
May 22, 2008 in eXile Blog
If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control
Yet another hot Russian babe imitating the Catpower look...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control
Sure, the Ottomans shut down the Istanbul Slavic slave markets centuries ago...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control
The priest is going, "Father Sansei is very impressed with grasshopper Sasha’s...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control
We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

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John Dolan120 ARTICLES May 19, 2008 Literary Frauds Strike Again ...and Again Book Review
Say you meet me at a party and I tell you that when I was 7 years old, I killed a full-grown military officer, then ran off and was nurtured by a pack of wolves. Would you believe me or begin edging away quietly, keeping the snack table between us at all times...
April 17, 2008 Dark As Fuck: A Review of The Heroin Diaries by Nikki Sixx Book Review
The Motley Crue era was not a shining moment in pop history. In that sense, Nikki makes a fitting narrator. This is literally a tale told by an idiot. Everything about it is stale, forced and second-hand.
December 25, 2007 The eXile Guide to Aging Feature Story
Guiding you through a tour of the most horrible plot the world has ever known: Aging
September 8, 2006 Another British Genocide Book Review
Dr. Dolan looks at yet another British genocide hitherto unnoticed, and wonders if the Brits will ever have to pay?
March 7, 2006 Summoning Byron Book Review
Lord Byron is one of the best arguments for why the eXile is right, and everyone else is wrong...according to Dr. Dolan...
February 24, 2006 Whitewash on the Dark Continent Book Review
The whitewashing of England's worldwide genocide tour continues in earnest, and Dr. Dolan takes two of its most vile propagandists to task...
February 10, 2006 Whoa, Fiction I Can Praise! Book Review
After trashing Frey and leaving his smoldering corpse for all to view, Dr. Dolan comes up with a shocker: a book he actually doesn't hate!...
January 27, 2006 Frey's Fall Feature Story
James Frey has fallen - and Dr. Dolan is here to gloat over the frey'd ruins. The eXile has been calling him a liar and plagiarist for over two years, and as always, WE WERE RIGHT! Only problem is that smokinggun.com plagiarized the eXile...
December 15, 2005 The Plagiarism of James Frey Revealed Book Review
Dr. Dolan responds to yet another slew of hate emails sent to him by fans of James Frey, author of A Million Little Pieces...
November 18, 2005 You Blew It, Sean! Book Review
Dr. Dolan skewers another whiny rich-boy memoir...but the Doc doesn't feel great about doing it...
October 21, 2005 Big Brothers Feature Story
George Orwell and Christopher Hitchens eXposed! Dr. Dolan reveals the dirty dark truth about St. George Orwell, and why Hitchens really can claim to be his heir...
October 7, 2005 A Beautiful Doorstop Book Review
Dr. Dolan finds that this new study of Ivan is Book The Terrible...
September 23, 2005 Hey Freepers! Mark Steyn Hates You! Press Review
Dr. Dolan reminds us that neo-con cheerleader Mark Steyn was once one of the most openly anti-American writers in the English-language press...
September 9, 2005 Frey’s Fairy Godfather Book Review
"James Frey is a liar. A bad one..." America's shittiest writer is back with an even worse book than his first...
July 1, 2005 28 Months Later Feature Story
28 months after the invasion of Iraq, the eXile meathooks all the slobbering zombies who sold it as a "cakewalk" back into the public eye, and invites everyone to engage in a little target practice...or what we call "Extinction Packages"...
June 3, 2005 An Ordinary Joe Book Review
Dr. Dolan reviews Robert Service's new biography on Stalin, and finds that in spite of the impressive research, the intellectual flaws are so glaring that Dr. Dolan has no choice but to liquidate this book...
May 20, 2005 Pleasant Hell Book Review
Dr. Dolan's first blood-slicked day at work is recounted in this hilarious excerpt from his novel "Pleasant Hell"...
April 22, 2005 Exterminate The Men Feature Story
Dr. Dolan eulogizes Andrea Dworkin, and explains why every Beigeist coward is so relieved that she's finally dead...
April 8, 2005 Dead Catholics Feature Story
The Pope and Terry Schiavo may have finally died, but Catholicism has been dead for nearly half a century, writes Dr. Dolan...
March 25, 2005 Post-Bullshitist Bullshit Book Review
Don't be fooled by Princeton philosopher Harry Frankfurt's populist title for this book "On Bullshit" - this little academic treatise is just the same old shit...
March 11, 2005 Hell Is Other People on Amazon Unfiled
Dr. Dolan reviews the reviewers on amazon.com, and finds...the dark and dumb American soul. Read it, before it's too late!
February 11, 2005 Expensive Pain Unfiled
When I hear people boast that they've never had a cavity I realize I'm from an older world, where every mouth was a
December 24, 2004 Me and the Betel Book Review
Dr. Dolan tries to get high the holistic, all-natural hippie way, and gets burned...literally
October 1, 2004 Ballard: A Sinner Redeemed Book Review
"Empire of the Sun" - J. G. Ballard See it on Amazon.com... When you're living in a cabin in the rainfo
September 4, 2004 Anne Applebaum, Professional Mourner Book Review
Why must we remember the millions who died in the Soviet camps? That nasty "why?" kept dogging me as I made my way through this long and well-researched history of the GULAG
June 10, 2004 Here Lies the Worst of All Unfiled
Every fool in America is deep in mourning for this worthless man, who had no conscience, no intellect and no shame
June 10, 2004 Hogwarts without the Warts Kino Korner
When a Harry Potter movie comes to Moscow, Mark always passes the chore of reviewing it to me...
May 27, 2004 Snubbed in Budapest! Unfiled
The conference was called "the Culture of Periodicals," organized by a Budapest University, and they wanted the eXile to take part
May 27, 2004 Pushkin Dulled Down Book Review
It took me a while to realize that dulling down Pushkin was the whole point of this book
May 13, 2004 Abu Ghraibi Fever Feature Story
We're here to say it loud and proud: playing with conquered peoples is the whole point of an having empire!
April 29, 2004 Stepmother War Book Review
Zinky Boys is, as far as I know, the only oral history by Afghan vets available in English.
April 22, 2004 Bad Hobbit Kino Korner
The charges: treason and sabotage. Jackson’s three Lord of the Rings films are designed to sabotage all the most noble and unworldly elements of Tolkien’s story.
April 16, 2004 Ultra-Face Unfiled
I have the distinction of having been denied entrance to some of the most humble and egalitarian places in town
April 16, 2004 Punish the Pundits, Round Two Unfiled
The eXile has never bought that forgive-and-forget stuff--our creed is remember-and-avenge...
April 16, 2004 A Holy Book Book Review
If I have to worship something, I'll take the mammals. After all, they were the first things humans worshipped.
April 5, 2004 Salnikov Saves Russia Book Review
"Lost Splendor - The Amazing Memoirs of the Man Who Killed Rasputin", by Prince Felix Youssoupoff...
April 1, 2004 Punish the Pundits! Feature Story
What if the people who who assured us that invading Iraq would be fun and easy, actually had to deal with the consequences of their lies?
March 4, 2004 Comrade Terminator Book Review
"Full Spectrum Disorder: The Military in the New American Century" by Stan Goff.
February 19, 2004 Never Trust A Real-Estate Agent Book Review
"The Siberian Curse: How Communist Planners Left Russia Out in the Cold" - By Fiona Hill and Clifford Gaddy Brookings.
December 12, 2003 Meeting the NatsBols Feature Story
The NatsBols are the Tasmanian Devils of the Russian political scene, and proud of it. They specialize in non-lethal violence...
December 12, 2003 Book of the Dead-and Dumb Book Review
As a living human, you may wonder why you should have to read such deathly prose. The short answer is: survival.
November 25, 2003 This Passport is Not Valid Press Review
You have to admire a magazine that devotes the cover of its first issue to a picture of an expat being run over by a Moscow taxi...
November 13, 2003 Among the Baptists City Beat
I went to a Baptist service in Moscow last Sunday. It’s not that I’m getting religion...
November 13, 2003 Logic for Locusts Book Review
Robert Baer, author of "Sleeping with the Devil", not only claims to be a veteran of CIA, but writes with the irksome swagger readers expect from a Langley man.
October 28, 2003 Love Smites Book Review
PLATFORM, Houellebecq’s new novel, is in some ways better than Elementary Particles...
October 16, 2003 Zhirik + Vanya 4 Ever Book Review
In telling Ivan, the paradigmatic Russian everyman, to “wrap up” his soul, Zhirinovskii is playing on the Russian cliche of Ivan...
October 2, 2003 Walk On The Shy Side City Beat
Thinking about the delights of seeing things you can’t understand, I decided to perform an experiment at my local Metro station...
September 18, 2003 A Bad Man Speaking Well Book Review
Most people know one thing about Celine: “Wasn’t he a Nazi?” This cultivated ignorance holds even among people who are paid to know better...
September 18, 2003 Fashion Shows: A Guide for Cowards City Beat
I’m here to do a job, and if that job means covering a fashion show, I’m there — come sneer, feis kontrol, or snickers...
September 4, 2003 Poisoned By CNN Press Review
John Dolan looks back on three harrowing days glued to CNN in his Tallin hotel room.
September 4, 2003 Smut for the Pious Book Review
The idea for this book was so good you wouldn’t think anybody could mess it up: go around the world interviewing fallen dictators...
August 24, 2003 Jesus Ate Their Brains! Feature Story
Russia has finally had a controversy over the public school reading list, a sure sign that Westernization is proceeding apace...
July 24, 2003 Rehab at Tiffany’s Book Review
Hi. I'm Augusten Burroughs, and I'm here to introduce my memoir, Dry...
July 10, 2003 No Respect, No Respect at All Book Review
William Taubman’s brilliant biography of Khrushchev demonstrates that the Stalinists were the funniest fascists of the twentieth century...
June 26, 2003 Satter The Almost Just Book Review
"Darkness at Dawn: The Rise of the Russian Criminal State", by David Satter, reviewed...
June 26, 2003 A Hymn to the Metro City Beat
I admire the Moscow Metro as the best urban transport system in the world...
June 12, 2003 Bardamu in Kuwait Book Review
Of course Bardamu walks into the Western Front, while Swofford walks into a small colonial war where nobody’s likely to get hurt...
May 29, 2003 Remont Season City Beat
When they started using their hammers on the water pipes instead of the concrete, that’s when it got serious...
May 29, 2003 A Million Pieces Of Shit Book Review
"A Million Little Pieces" is the dregs of a degraded genre, the rehab memoir...
May 20, 2003 A True Loser - For Once Book Review
Every now and then, someone sends us an apparently self-published book good enough to read...
May 3, 2003 I, John Dolan, Goes Elitny City Beat
I was assigned to attend unveiling of a new model of BMW convertible in one of Moscow’s trendiest cafes...
April 17, 2003 The Bums Will Always Lose Feature Story
The game is over: for the rest of your lifetime, the world is going to be run by Bush’s America. We offer to destroy your hopes right now, free of charge.
April 6, 2003 Fairytales for the Scared Stupid Book Review
I knew it would be a facile, opportunistic and untenable definitional/moral argument against “terrorism...”
March 20, 2003 Paddy Goes Better with Coke City Beat
Red and white were the colors flying over this year’s St Patrick’s Day parade in Moscow...
March 20, 2003 Nostalgia for the Blood Mop Unfiled
I wheedled a press ticket to the World Championship of No-Rules Fighting last Saturday night...
February 6, 2003 City Beat City Beat
Last week Moscow hospitals announced that 202 people had been admitted over the weekend for “ice-related injuries."
February 6, 2003 This One Goes to Eleven Megatons Book Review
"The Kremlin’s Nuclear Sword: The Rise and Fall of Russia’s Strategic Nuclear Forces" by Steven J. Zaloga - reviewed.
February 6, 2003 Reading the Ice Unfiled
The first skill you need is reading different pavings. This is particularly important in the Metro in winter...
December 11, 2002 The Dictatorship of the Pumped Book Review
This is the best book on Yelstin’s era to be published in English. If you only read one book on recent Russian history, read Violent Entrepreneurs.
November 27, 2002 Mikey McFaul and the Three Bears Book Review
This book is a four-hundred page testimonial to the intellectual and moral bankruptcy of the American Russia-watching mafia...
November 13, 2002 Belated Praise: The Elementary Particles Book Review
The Elementary Particles came out two years ago but this is the only recent novel which seems to’ve meant anything to eXile readers.
October 17, 2002 Death by Americanization Book Review
Rerview of "Siberia Bound: Chasing the American Dream on Russia’s Wild Frontier" by Alexander Blakely
October 2, 2002 A Spy Groupie You Can Respect Book Review
The highest compliment I can pay James Bamford is to say that, after reading his book on the history of the National Security Agency, I trust him.
September 19, 2002 Thaw Me a Mammoth Book Review
"MAMMOTH: the Resurrection of an Ice Age Giant" By Richard Stone, reviewed.
September 19, 2002 America, Torture Capital of the World Unfiled
Take a bow, all you pillars of the community. Torture's going strong in every state in America, and you taxpayers are the ones who make it possible.
September 6, 2002 The Russian Hack Book Review
John Dolan reviews "The Russia Hand" by Strobe Talbot.
August 23, 2002 Let's Get Physical! Unfiled
Physical pain is the most important thing in the world. Mating may come second, but it’s a distant second except for the ten years from puberty to the mid-twenties...
August 8, 2002 Berkeley Bustard, Afghan Sucker Book Review
I asked readers if they knew of any Russian soldiers’ first-person accounts of the Afghan war, and got a letter from one Vladislav Tamarov, who had written just such a book.
July 25, 2002 Missing the Mongols Feature Story
We miss the Mongols. We need them, because they were the only nuclear power before the twentieth century.
July 25, 2002 Skunk Prose: This Is Your Book On Pot Book Review
I’m all for a United Druggie Front. But it’s not so easy to feel solidarity when you read an entire book written from the perspective of a pot-head.
June 28, 2002 Books That Was in Nam Book Review
Dispatches by Michael Herr, Everything We Had ed. by Al Santoli, Once A Warrior King by David Donovan Chickenhawk by Robert Mason, and more
June 26, 2002 Why We Always Wight Book Review
"Why we fight: Moral Clarity and the War on Terrorism" by William Bennett reviewed
April 21, 2002 The Case for Nuclear Winter Feature Story
If there were any real nihilists, they would praise nuclear weapons as the means to bring an end to the world via nuclear winter.
March 21, 2002 How Beautiful You Are, My Baron! Book Review
The Corrections, billed as a masterpiece, is a worthless fraud, a hopelessly trite story gaudied up with tedious overwriting...
March 6, 2002 How I Harrassed The Working Class Book Review
I’m a harasser. I harassed the working class. And it wasn’t even fun. It’s not like I groped some factory girl as she leaned over a sweaty sewing machine, I did was post an email reply to a “Call for Papers" on the work of “Jim Daniel, Working-Class Poet.
February 20, 2002 Breathe On Us, Oh God! Book Review
Professor John Dolan reviews "Praying For America" by Dutch Sheets...
February 6, 2002 The Hidden Lust Book Review
Professor John Dolan reviews "The Hidden War: A Russian Journalist’s Account of the Soviet War in Afghanistan" by Artyom Borovik...
February 6, 2002 Buy A Baggie, Save A Child Unfiled
The White House has joined the Super Bowl advertising blitz, paying more than $3 million to warn during Sunday’s game that buying drugs could fund terrorists...
December 26, 2001 The mongols of Ulster Book Review
Professor John Dolan reviews "In the Empire of Genghis Khan: A Journey among Nomads" by Stanley Stewart...
November 15, 2001 The Three Amigos: A Tale of Love and Loss in Manhattan Unfiled
Professor Dolan recounts the tragic tale of three unlikely friends whose shared love for work and country led to their untimely demise amid the flames and destruction of the World Trade Center collapse...
November 1, 2001 Don't Make Me Wear That Damn Flag Unfiled
John Dolan finds that shiftless lefty commentators are forcing him back into the unpleasant realm of the patriotic...
October 18, 2001 CLEANSE THE WORLD Feature Story
"A nation that would rather send a three-million dollar cruise missile than risk the life of a few soldiers is a nation with no effectual military power at all." Dr. John Dolan on the practical value of the U.S. arsenal...
August 23, 2001 In the Land of the Heroic Leeches Unfiled
Professor Dolan investigates the peculiar phenomenon of career military men turned anti-Big Government zealots...
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headline
Dyev's Diary By Lyolya Androsova
blurb
Pourquoi L'Exile
Feature Story By eXile Staff
The time has come for the eXile to shake off its decrepit English-language shackles and appear in glorious French—just in time for Bastille Day! Editor Matt Taibbi and Special Guest Translator Thierry Marignac explain why...
Le nouvel ennemi
Unfiled By Kevin McElwee
The Sociopath examines the gradual transformation of the traditional American image of the average Frenchman from impossibly snobbish buffoon to an anti-market saboteur who is nothing short of the inheritor of the rank of the Soviet Union's as the United
La manière de
Sports Section
The Paris Bureau of the eXile Sports Desk looks into the recent "triumphs" of the French soccer team and the fate of "doping" at the Tour de France...
Razzia sur la shnouff
Kino Korner By Kevin McElwee
Krazy Kevin looks into the under-appreciated GoodFellas-influenced BLOW, while also finding a few spare moments to casually dismiss the idiotic MISS CONGENIALITY and ALONG CAME A SPIDER...
Liberté. Égalité. Opportunité.
Editorial
Forward-looking French businesses are primed and ready to storm the Bastille of the Russian market... just as their revolutionary counterparts did in Paris back in 1789......
Your Letters
[SIC!]
La Trique... Insult? Par Un Ane... Binoclard avec une collection de disques... Goyal sort du placard de napol?on... Retour de manivelle... Rarretelle... Connard monoglotte... Analphabete... Ivanise—vice... L’h?breu ex-sit?...
Cold Bullshit
Feature Story
The new Cold War smells like shit, tastes like shit, and, as our stool sample shows, makes us gag like shit...finally, proof that a billion flies are wrong.
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