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 For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
June 11, 2008 in eXile Blog
 The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
May 28, 2008 in eXile Blog
 A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
May 22, 2008 in eXile Blog
 If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control
 Yet another hot Russian babe imitating the Catpower look...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control
 Sure, the Ottomans shut down the Istanbul Slavic slave markets centuries ago...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control
 The priest is going, "Father Sansei is very impressed with grasshopper Sasha’s...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control
 We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control
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| Field Guide |
December 31, 1970 |
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Field Guide To Moscow: Garrulus Garrulus
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Garrulus Garrulus
Bearded Intelligentsia
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Distinguishing features: Shaggy beard and hair so authentic you know
that they do it out of necessity rather than irony. Shitty button-down shirts, and most
importantly, shitty sandals. They always wear shitty sandals.
Habitat: Any Project OGI, Gogol, or other cheap cafe-restaurant
serving sovok food with an intellectual veneer. Kitchens.
Danger if Provoked: Moderate to high. If you ask about anything from
politics to literature to the weather, you will be subjected to a six-hour discourse on
every subject under the moon, infused with deductive reasoning the likes of which has not
been seen or heard since the days of the Toga. Moreover, you will be asked to buy him
100g of vodka every 30 minutes, and you will be told that it is "normal" for a person to
buy a bearded intellectual vodka, as well as pickled cucumbers, in order to reward his
genius.
Mortal Weaknesses: Halyava.
Comments: Garrulus Garrulus tends to avoid expats because he believes
they're not just vulgar, but stingy.
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| FROM THE VAULT |
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Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
Editorial
The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.
Eleven Years of Threats: The eXile's Incredible Journey
Feature Story By The eXile
Good Night, and Bad Luck: In a nation terrorized by its own government, one newspaper dared to fart in its face. Get out your hankies, cuz we’re taking a look back at the impossible crises we overcame.
Clubbing Adventures Through Time
Club Review By Dmitriy Babooshka
eXile club reviewer Babooshka takes a trip through time with the ghost of Moscow clubbing past, present and future, and true to form, gets laid in the process.
The Fortnight Spin
Bardak Calendar By Jared Lindquist
Jared comes out with yet another roundup of upcoming bardak sessions.
Your Letters
[SIC!]
Russia's freedom-loving free market martyr Mikhail Khodorkovsky answers some of this week's letters, and he's got nothing but praise for President Medvedev.
Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
Automotive Section
We’re happy to introduce a new column in which we publish Moscow’s raw radio communications, courtesy of a Russian amateur radio enthusiast. This issue, eXile readers are given a peek into the secret conversations of Moscow’s traffic police, the notorious "GAIshniki."
Your Letters
[SIC!]
Richard Gere tackles this week's letters. Now reformed, he fights for gerbil rights all around the world.
War Nerd Summer Reading Guide
The War Nerd By Gary Brecher
It’s summer, you’ve got a little more time off, so you can read up on war instead of trying to live in whatever boring suburb you live in. Lawns, neighbors, dogs, kids—it all sucks and the best thing you can do is get as far out of it as you can.
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