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Vlad's Daily Gloat - The eXile Blog

The Fall of The eXile For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
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War Nerd: War of the Babies in Taki's Magazine The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
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Kids, Meet Your President A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
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Cellphone Democracy Cam If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
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May 15, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Club Photos w/Russian Dyevs We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

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[SIC!] May 8, 2008
Your Letters
Page 2 of 3

Im not in Iraq...because I've allready been dumbass... how about you? Ive earned my right to surf all I want. Now.... you got anything substitive to say about that?

Fix your crappy server.... its still slow as honey in the winter.

Daniel Allen

Dear Mr. Allen, You are our hero. God bless you. Oh, and please brush your teeth.



I've only read a couple of your columns but I wanted to drop you a line and let you know that I enjoy them. Its refreshing to see that I'm not the only idiot with nothing better to do than to read about military forces. My interests seem to be more recent and conventional than yours-I'm more interested in the Korean War and the Eastern Front WWII than you, but there's no question that you know what you're talking about and that you're writing well about the subject.

Here's a dumb question-I assume that you wargame? The boardgames are definitely better than the computer products, but the programmers have done some amazing stuff. I play ASL and a few of the others. I'm going to start trolling your archives and reading your older stuff. Feel free to drop me a line sometime.

Bryan White

Duncanville, TX

Dear Mr. White, Barack Obama replies, "Let me just say first of all to Bryan that I appreciate your letter, and I think it raises an important issue to the American people. You see, for too long now, the American people have been subjected to the KILL WHITEY! KILL THE MUTHUFUCKUH! KILL BRYAN WHITE AND ALL HIS MO’FO’ CRACKER-ASS FAMILY! old way of playing wargames, and the old way of doing politics. Quite frankly, as Bryan’s letter shows, the American people are sick and tired of the politics of division, and they’re looking for change, for hope, for a way TO KILL WHITEY! TAKE ALL HIS MUTHUFUCKIN SHIT, STEAL HIS MUTHUFUCKIN SATURN, AND SELL IT ALL ON THE SIDE, MAN! to address real-world issues, such as how to pay the mortgage, how to play a war game, and how to KILL WHITEY! On behalf of Bryan White and all the Bryan Whites out there, I say, YO’ DAY IS COMIN’ FOO’!



I been reading you for a while man and you are right on! I lived in USA for 22 years and it's exactly like you describe it. Keep on writing man~!


Dear Mr. Plamen, Actually, ever since we saw this letter to Vlad, we told him to stop writing. You only have yourself to blame for the fact that Vlad hasn’t posted a single blog entry since. Folks, can you please stop saying things like "keep on doing the thing you’re doing right now," this isn’t a goddamn soccer practice or the local Gold’s Gym incline bench press. By tainting our genius with your words of encouragement, you give the impression that you somehow have a hand in it all. Here’s some news for you: YOUR HAND IS DISEASED WITH MEDIOCRITY, AND IT’S HIGHLY COMMUNICABLE. KEEP YOUR MEDIOCRE WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT AWAY FROM OUR DELICATE GENIUS. JUST SHUTTUP, AND FIND A WAY TO SEND US YOUR MONEY IN SOME ANONYMOUS MANNER THAT DOESN’T PUT US INTO DIRECT OR INDIRECT OR EVEN INDIRECT-TWICE-REMOVED CONTACT WITH YOU. Okay, we’re calming down a bit… Look, if that doesn’t work, well then, forget what we just wrote there. I mean, who the heck’re we kiddin here? Of course we’ll take the praise. We’re vain, Plamen. Our vanity is matched only by our fiscal gullibility. We sit here and abuse you for paying us cheap compliments rather than dollars ‘n cents, but you know and we know that we’re not going to turn your cheap praise away. We want your money; you want your money; so you keep your money, risk losing our free creative labor, and voila! We offer yet more free creative labor! We want your praise; you give us your praise, shrugging your shoulders at how cheap and easy we are to buy off, even cheaper than Tajik construction workers. Our priorities have always been wrong, and they always will be.

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Moscow Nitelife Roundup :
Ofis Space
September Sadness : Back to the office, where it’s the same old shit, plus tans.

Moscow Nitelife Roundup :

The eXile introduces… amateur Whore-R Stories! :


Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.

Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
Automotive Section
We’re happy to introduce a new column in which we publish Moscow’s raw radio communications, courtesy of a Russian amateur radio enthusiast. This issue, eXile readers are given a peek into the secret conversations of Moscow’s traffic police, the notorious "GAIshniki."

Eleven Years of Threats: The eXile's Incredible Journey
Feature Story By The eXile
Good Night, and Bad Luck: In a nation terrorized by its own government, one newspaper dared to fart in its face. Get out your hankies, cuz we’re taking a look back at the impossible crises we overcame.

Your Letters
Russia's freedom-loving free market martyr Mikhail Khodorkovsky answers some of this week's letters, and he's got nothing but praise for President Medvedev.

Clubbing Adventures Through Time
Club Review By Dmitriy Babooshka
eXile club reviewer Babooshka takes a trip through time with the ghost of Moscow clubbing past, present and future, and true to form, gets laid in the process.

The Fortnight Spin
Bardak Calendar By Jared Lindquist
Jared comes out with yet another roundup of upcoming bardak sessions.

Your Letters
Richard Gere tackles this week's letters. Now reformed, he fights for gerbil rights all around the world.

13 Toxic Talents: Hollywood’s Worst Polluters
America By Eileen Jones
Everybody complains about celebrities, but nobody does anything about them. People, it’s time to stop fretting about whether we’re a celebrity-obsessed culture—we are, we have been, we’re going to be—and instead take practical steps to clean up the celebrity-obsessed culture we’ve got...


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