Mankind's only alternative 6   OCT.   22  
Mankind's only alternative

The Fall of The eXile For all those wondering what the "Save The eXile Fundrasier" banner is all about, here it is as simply as it can be phrased: The eXile is shutting down.
June 11, 2008 in eXile Blog

War Nerd: War of the Babies in Taki's Magazine The War Nerd talks about babies, the greatest weapon of the 20th century.
May 28, 2008 in eXile Blog

Kids, Meet Your President A website for Russian kids to learn all about President Medvedev's passion for school, sports and family.
May 22, 2008 in eXile Blog

Cellphone Democracy Cam If this girl was exposed to Jeffersonian democracy...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Dyev Photos Yet another hot Russian babe imitating the Catpower look...
May 20, 2008 in Face Control

Proof That Genetic Memory Is Real! Sure, the Ottomans shut down the Istanbul Slavic slave markets centuries ago...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

Russia's Orthodox Church Youth Outreach Program The priest is going, "Father Sansei is very impressed with grasshopper Sasha’s...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

More Classy B&W Club Photos w/Russian Dyevs We took the Pepsi Challenge here...
May 15, 2008 in Face Control

Blogs RSS feed

Unfiled June 28, 2002
One Day in Doctor Limonov's Prisoner Life
By Edward Limonov Browse author
Page 2 of 2
I was awakened in less than 40 minutes time: "A breakfast?" Fooder open, clad in white gown women-cook looks at us. "No thanks!" We never eat breakfast, but she asks nevertheless. They ask, because she is not only one cook woman.

After cook-woman that is a turn of deputy officer: "Take a walk?"

I never refused. Ikhtiander goes to the roof of a prison for a walk twice a month or three times a month. He is lazy. I am going every day, regardless of weather or health, because I am doing my sport exercises. Morning before the walk it's a painful time of the day. Why don't they do at once everything: collect garbage, collect letters, serve breakfast and sign you up for a walk? Because administration wants to be present in your life constantly.

About 8:10 they open the door to take me to the prison yard. Lefortovo Prison regulation requires that prisoners don't see each other. Lefortovo is a prison for the enemies of State. So we are walked as lonely Dantesque personages in our personal hell for each one of US. The prison yard is a few square meters of sky hidden by bars and iron net. That is also cell, but without ceiling-only bars and iron net. Population of cell-two or three prisoners. Not all prisoners go to the yard.

All 60 minutes some stupid radio station like "Russian Radio" or "Avto-Radio" or very stupid "Evropa Plus" plays aloud in my ears. All 60 minutes I run, I made endless push-ups, and other exercises, as running in kneeling position. Then I go back to cell where Ikhtiander is tortured in his sleep. He is also very stinking animal, he eats too much.

I boil myself a tea, I sit, I write, I read some of my five newspapers. I receive them by post: "Kommersant," "Nezavisamaya Gazeta," "Zavtra," "Sovietskaya Rossiaya" and "Limonka".

From 13.000 to 14.00 fooder opens again for serve us a soup and then second dish. Soup is a soup of prison-as to a second dish it is a boiled fish with a potato or kasha. Boiled seliodka, how about that! Edmunch Poupe like it.

After dinner I use my great privilege. AS far as I know I am only one prisoner who is permitted to work at some empty cell where I have a table lamp. Nobody never before heard in Lefortovo about table lamp. So I write from 14.30 until 19.30. I wrote six books and one play under that Lefortovo lamp, produced somewhere back in the 1930s. As I joked once, "Marshal Blukher probably wrote a full-hearted recognition of his crimes under that lamp." That is green lamp with a stalk and a red button.

About 19.40 I am walking back to my cell, my hands behind my back, clutching my notebooks. The color of walls in prison corridors-rosy until 1.5 meter high (rosy-unbelievable, isn't it!) and white above. Floors are color of adult shit. Corridors are four floors high, they are constructed as letter "K" (in Catherine the Great's time). In place where all parts of letter "K" are connected together that is a big table with computers and telephones and some devices of supervision (control of video cameras and microphones). Our prison is a beautiful piece of architecture.

Then we eat with Ikhtiander. Then I watch some news. Exactly at 22.00 I go to bed following the voice from "fooder." Ikhtiander stay to watch teley (he is writing "demands" very day under excuse that he wants to watch a match of football, but he watches movies.)

I am accused of organizing armed formation with a goal to commit terrorist attack on territory of Northern Kazakhstan and buying arms for that purpose. If condemned, I can have up to 24 years in prison, according to articles 205, 208, 222 and 280 of Russian penal code.

Truly Yours.

SHARE:  Digg  My Web  Facebook  Reddit
Pedophile DP
The DP That Could’ve : August isn’t hot just for us normals, it affects the pedophile murderin’ types, too.
RPG-weilding Arab
RPG vs. M1 :

2001: A Zap Odyssey :

Crude: The Motherland Arises :


Save The eXile: The War Nerd Calls Mayday
The future of The eXile is in your hands! We're holding a fundraiser to save the paper, and your soul. Tune in to Gary Brecher's urgent request for reinforcements and donate as much as you can. If you don't, we'll be overrun and wiped off the face of the earth, forever.

Scanning Moscow’s Traffic Cops
Automotive Section
We’re happy to introduce a new column in which we publish Moscow’s raw radio communications, courtesy of a Russian amateur radio enthusiast. This issue, eXile readers are given a peek into the secret conversations of Moscow’s traffic police, the notorious "GAIshniki."

Eleven Years of Threats: The eXile's Incredible Journey
Feature Story By The eXile
Good Night, and Bad Luck: In a nation terrorized by its own government, one newspaper dared to fart in its face. Get out your hankies, cuz we’re taking a look back at the impossible crises we overcame.

Your Letters
Russia's freedom-loving free market martyr Mikhail Khodorkovsky answers some of this week's letters, and he's got nothing but praise for President Medvedev.

Clubbing Adventures Through Time
Club Review By Dmitriy Babooshka
eXile club reviewer Babooshka takes a trip through time with the ghost of Moscow clubbing past, present and future, and true to form, gets laid in the process.

The Fortnight Spin
Bardak Calendar By Jared Lindquist
Jared comes out with yet another roundup of upcoming bardak sessions.

Your Letters
Richard Gere tackles this week's letters. Now reformed, he fights for gerbil rights all around the world.

13 Toxic Talents: Hollywood’s Worst Polluters
America By Eileen Jones
Everybody complains about celebrities, but nobody does anything about them. People, it’s time to stop fretting about whether we’re a celebrity-obsessed culture—we are, we have been, we’re going to be—and instead take practical steps to clean up the celebrity-obsessed culture we’ve got...


    MAIN    |    RUSSIA    |    WAR NERD     |    [SIC!]    |    BAR-DAK    |    THE VAULT    |    ABOUT US    |    RSS

© "the eXile". Tel.: +7 (495) 623-3565, fax: +7 (495) 623-5442